the [alternate] patriot


 

Friday, February 06, 2004

Political humor

 
  • A spokesman for the military said today they expect to catch Osama bin
    Laden this year. I understand they're shooting for the first week November.
    (Jay Leno)

  • The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court ruled Wednesday in favor of gay
    marriage. Official reaction was mixed. John Kerry expressed his opposition,
    but Ted Kennedy is forbidden by the laws of comedy from taking a position
    on the sanctity of marriage. (Argus Hamilton)

  • Yes! We finally brought Martha Stewart to trial. You know, with all the
    massive and almost completely unpunished fraud perpetrated on the public by
    companies like Enron, Global Crossing, and Tyco we finally got the ring
    leader. Maybe now we can lower the nation's terror alert to periwinkle.
    (Jon Stewart)

  • They say Bush's popularity is falling so fast, his new secret service
    codename is "Howard Dean." (Jay Leno)



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